Escaping the Heat

I never thought I'd say this, but please make the sex stop. It's just that it's summer, and damn it, it's everywhere. Everyone is doing it.

So after a long day, I dragged myself in the door, turned on the kettle, fell into my chair and watched as my computer booted up. Ugh...I just want to sleep I thought. This evening I was particularly exhausted after losing hours of sleep (and my life) to the sound of my neighbours upstairs. That evening my neighbour found God (several times) while I found the self-suffocation via the pillow method to be incredibly unsuccessful.

So while getting my eye push ups in for the evening and forcing myself to focus for just one more hour, I typed away on a proposal before calling it a night. Taking a sigh of relief, I closed my laptop shut and then it started...

...the raccoons.

Just when I thought my neighbour had found her spirituality, so had they...for an hour and a half. Squealing to the God's in a language that bled my ears, I had had it. My suspicions were right...everyone really is doing it but me.

No, I don't feel left out (well okay, maybe just a little) but it happens to be especially loud now that I'm single. So I had to ask myself, how do you escape the summer heat?

I certainly wasn't going to turn to the Intellect. After thinking that maybe I could be with him, I realized that the nail in the coffin was in...drilled in. It was done and I was better off without him. So as relief washed over me and anger subsided, I had to occupy myself as much as possible. There would be no sex...at least not for a while.

But as I walked down Queen West, there were teenagers imprinting suction tattoos on each other's necks. Then, to my left, was another couple at the stop lights chewing each other's faces off. It was unnerving.

Keep busy girl, keep walking...look straight ahead...they are merely a figment of your imagination.

My solution? I've packed my schedule: exams, assignments, picking up the guitar again, Sexy Food Therapy blogs and proposals, and going out with friends left, right and centre. I've never been so busy. However, despite how much I try to pack it in...I keep seeing it...people in heat.

Get out of the heat Melissa.

Coming home one evening, I came up with a plan. Wedging my iPhone speakers into my ears and selecting shuffle on my Michael Jackson playlist, I strutted into Lenny Organics in Cabbagetown and bought the ingredients I needed. Making my way home and flinging the door open to a swift hip check to the beat, I entered my apartment where the Oh God's had found walls to echo in. But I was determined. No matter how loud my neighbours upstairs or the ones in the backyard wanted to be, I would drown them out if they started back up again.

No, not that way...get your mind out of the gutter now would you?

Instead, that evening, I decided to indulge in a little sexy food take on an old classic, run a major bubble bath and allow my ears to date a very loud Nocturne in C# minor by Fredric Chopin.

CACAO SEXY SUMMER RICE KRISPIES

3/4 cup crunchy almond butter

1/2 cup unpasteurized honey

1/4 cup cacao nibs

4 tbsp vanilla rice protein powder

2 tbsp ground chia or flaxseed

2 tbsp shredded coconut

2 tbsp Artisana Organic Cacao bliss

3 cups brown rice krispies

Melt cacao coconut butter over medium heat. Stir quickly and be careful not to burn. Pour into a bowl and add in pecan butter and honey and combine well.

Mix in the rest of the ingredients but leave the rice krispies last.

Gently stir in rice krispies and put into a buttered pan. Conform to the pan and spread evenly.

Top with nuts, cacao nibs and sliced strawberries.

Put in freezer for an hour and transfer into fridge.

One of the questions I get when it comes to coconut products are, what the difference is between coconut butter and coconut oil? Here in this recipe, I've used Artisana's Organic Cacao bliss, which is coconut butter. Coconut butter when heated will burn, versus the oil which can be used to saute vegetables easily. The butter still has the meat of the coconut in it and is used as a spread, fruit dip, added to smoothies or in recipes like the one above. Artisana has a variety of different coconut butters, but because I love chocolate, I went right for their cacao bliss...and bliss it is.

Cacao believe it or not was once used as currency back in Mexico as late as 1887. It has long been reveared as an aphrodisiac and amazing for providing the body with energy. Without all the sugar, cacao is quite bitter and in Chinese Nutrition Therapy, they say bitter has an affinity for the heart. Which makes sense when you look at a lot of cacao's cardiac benefits: lowering blood pressure, high in phenols which counters artery-clogging fat and treating severe chest pain of angina pectoris. While not proven, it still has been a staple for the brokenhearted.

Now by no means did I make this to soothe my woes, because for the first time, I feel confidently back on my feet. I did however, decide to make this because I thought it was about time to treat myself. Carefully slipping my feet into a hot bubble bath one by one, I took the plunge and took a sigh of relief. Finally, I had created peace and tranquility. Just as I was self-pruning for all of fifteen minutes, the buzzer went off.

If you ignore it, it will just go away.

Then a text message.

Christ, I thought I shut off my iPhone.

Then the buzzer again.

Oh for the love of God...

Stumbling out of the tub and punting my rice krispies across the bathroom (f#@!). I ran my wet little self to the intercom.

What?!

And there she was...Gail, my best friend. "Get your ass together, we're going out. New martini bar, Cabbagetown. Let me in."

I could fight it...but I knew it would be a losing battle. I was being taken hostage and would have to roll with the punches. Slipping on my skinny jeans and wedging my feet into some heels I was off. At least I was able to squeeze in some me time I thought, but I'm not going to lie, getting out of the apartment felt good.

And as for all the sex around?

While booty calls aren't my thing...I can't say I'm not tempted.

While I'm not a fan of my neighbours...I have refrained from the idea of playing nicky nicky nine doors or blowing up the backyard.

That in the end, I really can't let all the sex around me get to me.

So there, strutting my stuff and holding my head up high (the three inch heels helped of course) on a perfect summer evening, the answer came to me. The best way to escape the heat and feel powerful than ever is to become it.